I broke with two friends many years ago - Jewish anti-Zionists - it was easy because they were no longer in my daily life. The 2 or 3 Jewish anti-Zionists who are in my circle now, have a pact not to speak about Israel. I am always tempted to snail-mail them things, including a post of yours - but it's a religion with them and nothing I say or send them will change their miinds. Even writing about this makes me enraged.
As you know, Elissa, I live in a heavily "progressive" region. Our independent bookstores are usually wonderful. These days, I hesitate to go into them. It's heartbreaking to see the callousness more than anything. The hatred? It's easier to address. The apathy is a killer. YET, there are non-Jews who are simply unengaged who can become allies. I now teach antisemitism awareness as part of my diversity training for new staff orientation every two weeks. I'm a bit nervous that someone will say something so out-there that it will be hard to respond. Then I remember, when I first led LGBTQ trainings 25 years ago, people would ask weird questions or make strange comments but I learned to listen and thank them for speaking and then I would explain whatever needed to be explained.
Yes, we do not hide as much as possible. I also understand friends of mine who are on the left, feminist, Zionist and afraid in certain circumstances. We each have to determine where we feel safe. I am more intrepid by nature and it makes me all the more protective towards people who are afraid. I feel particularly grateful when my own work inspires another person to be brave.
We carry on. Happy to comply with your posting requirements. Left you a message.
I appreciate your words so much. I keep so much inside, not to keep safe but to pass like I have always passed. A lifelong habit. I’m learning different now, and your thoughts help.
I wear my “Rockets to Roses” Star of David defiantly and also casually. It gently shocks me when people say “How pretty” (the Muslim nurse) or “I’m a Landsman!” Not as many dirty looks as I thought I’d get have occurred.
I’ve lost friends by choice and by anger. I’ve found a couple of new allies.
I’m frustrated and in pain daily. But I’m still wearing my little self identification as a Jew.
So fuck the haters.
Thank you for this space and for all who come here. 💙🤍💙
Oh, yes, I don't think you're judging. I'm just...doing what currently works for me. I have a filter on Facebook that is only my Jewish friends who are sympathetic to where I stand, and there are things I want to post sometimes, but I only post to them. Because when I share certain things with my general friends...well, sometimes the inadvertent antisemitism comes out.
I can't hide. I'm Israeli. But I also do not go 'into battle' online. There are non-Jewish friends who have reached out, and those who haven't. There was one time, early on, when a non-Jewish friend who had posted nothing at all about October 7 posted about the supposed Israeli strike on the Gaza hospital. I wrote to him, and to his credit, he apologized and acknowledged I was right - and he is even actually - alone among all my non-Jewish friends - posting about the anti-semitism he is seeing now. But there is almost nothing from one of my oldest non-Jewish friends, who lived in our street growing up and who was best man at my brother's wedding, and who even considered converting at one point. My nephew was a soldier on Oct 7, that same brother's son, and this friend did not write to my brother. I wrote to him and called him out on it, and then he wrote to him. But I don't think he's heard from him since.
I sometimes think we anglo olim have it hardest. We come from the English-speaking world, we see all the vitriol, we have engaged almost as much with the non-Jewish world as those who still live in it. We still feel part of it, so we feel the hate more keenly than the sabra Israelis. But we're also dealing with the direct trauma of October 7 and being Israeli and running to shelters and waiting for the next Iran bout. My oldest has his conscription date already, he will be in combat and I feel myself going slowly insane already just in anticipation.
We are a small community relative to yours but the anti Israel crowd is loud and pro Hamas. It’s dispiriting to say the least. After being called a Nazi I can no longer speak up at city council meetings. I thought I was brave but that in conjunction with the world wide explosion of antisemitism seriously wounds my soul. I’ve been in retreat trying to regain my strength reading everything I can get my hands on, 1948 by Benny Morris, Palestine 36 by Oren Kessler and listening to podcasts, reading Substacks. Your strength is an inspiration and I’m lucky to have at least a couple people in my life with similar abilities. Thank you so much.
I broke with two friends many years ago - Jewish anti-Zionists - it was easy because they were no longer in my daily life. The 2 or 3 Jewish anti-Zionists who are in my circle now, have a pact not to speak about Israel. I am always tempted to snail-mail them things, including a post of yours - but it's a religion with them and nothing I say or send them will change their miinds. Even writing about this makes me enraged.
As you know, Elissa, I live in a heavily "progressive" region. Our independent bookstores are usually wonderful. These days, I hesitate to go into them. It's heartbreaking to see the callousness more than anything. The hatred? It's easier to address. The apathy is a killer. YET, there are non-Jews who are simply unengaged who can become allies. I now teach antisemitism awareness as part of my diversity training for new staff orientation every two weeks. I'm a bit nervous that someone will say something so out-there that it will be hard to respond. Then I remember, when I first led LGBTQ trainings 25 years ago, people would ask weird questions or make strange comments but I learned to listen and thank them for speaking and then I would explain whatever needed to be explained.
Yes, we do not hide as much as possible. I also understand friends of mine who are on the left, feminist, Zionist and afraid in certain circumstances. We each have to determine where we feel safe. I am more intrepid by nature and it makes me all the more protective towards people who are afraid. I feel particularly grateful when my own work inspires another person to be brave.
We carry on. Happy to comply with your posting requirements. Left you a message.
I appreciate your words so much. I keep so much inside, not to keep safe but to pass like I have always passed. A lifelong habit. I’m learning different now, and your thoughts help.
I wear my “Rockets to Roses” Star of David defiantly and also casually. It gently shocks me when people say “How pretty” (the Muslim nurse) or “I’m a Landsman!” Not as many dirty looks as I thought I’d get have occurred.
I’ve lost friends by choice and by anger. I’ve found a couple of new allies.
I’m frustrated and in pain daily. But I’m still wearing my little self identification as a Jew.
So fuck the haters.
Thank you for this space and for all who come here. 💙🤍💙
You are braver than I am. I am hiding somewhat.
I'm not judging anyone. I'm just sharing what I believe is the key to our well-being.
Oh, yes, I don't think you're judging. I'm just...doing what currently works for me. I have a filter on Facebook that is only my Jewish friends who are sympathetic to where I stand, and there are things I want to post sometimes, but I only post to them. Because when I share certain things with my general friends...well, sometimes the inadvertent antisemitism comes out.
I can't hide. I'm Israeli. But I also do not go 'into battle' online. There are non-Jewish friends who have reached out, and those who haven't. There was one time, early on, when a non-Jewish friend who had posted nothing at all about October 7 posted about the supposed Israeli strike on the Gaza hospital. I wrote to him, and to his credit, he apologized and acknowledged I was right - and he is even actually - alone among all my non-Jewish friends - posting about the anti-semitism he is seeing now. But there is almost nothing from one of my oldest non-Jewish friends, who lived in our street growing up and who was best man at my brother's wedding, and who even considered converting at one point. My nephew was a soldier on Oct 7, that same brother's son, and this friend did not write to my brother. I wrote to him and called him out on it, and then he wrote to him. But I don't think he's heard from him since.
I sometimes think we anglo olim have it hardest. We come from the English-speaking world, we see all the vitriol, we have engaged almost as much with the non-Jewish world as those who still live in it. We still feel part of it, so we feel the hate more keenly than the sabra Israelis. But we're also dealing with the direct trauma of October 7 and being Israeli and running to shelters and waiting for the next Iran bout. My oldest has his conscription date already, he will be in combat and I feel myself going slowly insane already just in anticipation.
Your pain leaps off the page.
We are a small community relative to yours but the anti Israel crowd is loud and pro Hamas. It’s dispiriting to say the least. After being called a Nazi I can no longer speak up at city council meetings. I thought I was brave but that in conjunction with the world wide explosion of antisemitism seriously wounds my soul. I’ve been in retreat trying to regain my strength reading everything I can get my hands on, 1948 by Benny Morris, Palestine 36 by Oren Kessler and listening to podcasts, reading Substacks. Your strength is an inspiration and I’m lucky to have at least a couple people in my life with similar abilities. Thank you so much.
This, my beloved