The Voices In My Head

Children Of Israel Are Never Alone

Hey, beloved tribe.

Yesterday, a message from a former Facebook friend — a young Jewish woman with a Palestinian flag in her profile pic — appeared in my inbox.

Hi. I removed myself from your page a long time ago as we have very different views about Israel.

As Kamala Harris has been named as the person who will in all likelihood be our nominee, I am seeing some ardently pro Israel Jewish instagram accounts with community influence put out videos or stories that they are unsure they can vote for her because of Israel.

Not all Zionist Jews are single issue voters or put Israel as a high importance item, but a small selection do (I have a couple on my mom’s side -- one, a woman, even went to a Trump rally and shook his hand).

Antizionist Jews will never convince these people to reconsider. You and other liberal/progressive Zionists maybe can.

There will be plenty of people who for whatever reason refuse to vote for Kamala Harris. If she loses, people will blame the Jews even more than they already do for us losing democracy in the US.

I will try the best I can to convince the far leftists who I pretty much agree with but find unrealistic in terms of their dreams for the US.

I sat there looking at this message for a long time, wondering what — if anything — I should write in response.

I thought about this past Shabbat, when I’d brought a different personal dilemma to my rebbetzin Tzivie to get her counsel. She didn’t tell me what to do, but she did suggest a way to think about the issue more deeply.

“Listen to all the different voices in your head,” she said. “Let them all have their say. If you give each of them room to speak without judgment, then in time, I think the answer will come to you.”

Could there be more Jewish advice? I flashed on Reb Tevye in the field with his plow, mulling over the dilemma presented by each of his daughters in turn.

What kind of match would that be, with a poor tailor?

On the other hand, he's an honest, hard worker.

On the other hand, he has absolutely nothing.

On the other hand, things could never get worse for him; they could only get better.

They gave each other a pledge: unheard of, absurd!
They gave each other a pledge: unthinkable.

But look at my daughter's face: she loves him, she wants him.

Look at my daughter’s eyes: so hopeful.

And finally, having entertained each voice in turn, Tevye arrives at his verdict:

“Well, children, when shall we make the wedding?”

So I tried this myself. I didn’t have a plow to pull while ruminating but I did manage to put a few catnip plants in the ground as I let the voices in my head bicker freely. The internal argument went something like this:

Voice One: Delete her. Block her. Right after you tell her the sight of a Jew brandishing a Palestinian flag inside your inbox makes you want to jump in a scalding shower.

Voice Two: On the other hand… she says she left your page a long time ago, and yet she knows you support Kamala Harris. So did she actually leave? Or is she still reading your opinions? And if so, why? She has no reason to care what you think, but obviously she does. So that means there might be an opportunity here.

Voice One: Don’t bother. You have enough to do. You’ve already wasted time just looking at all the cloying virtue on her Facebook profile. “My heart is with Rafah.” “Free Palestine Now.” Quotes from JVP (Jewish Voice for Peace), blaming Israel for October 7th, siding with South Africa’s cynical publicity stunt at the ICJ.

Voice Two: On the other hand… the two of you agree on most things. You have 62 mutual friends, many of them Zionists. Plus she looks really young. And actually really sweet and even vulnerable. Look at her standing there against that flowered hedge, in her flowered dress and her glasses. Above all, she’s another Jew. And Jews shouldn’t write each other off, no matter what.

These two voices went at it like this for quite a while, until finally — as the rebbetzin predicted — the higher voice prevailed, and I ended up sending the following note:

Hi, R, and thanks for reaching out. Rest assured I will be doing everything in my power to persuade my fellow Zionists to vote for Kamala. In the meantime, your note piqued my curiosity on a number of fronts and I'm hoping to learn more about your perspective.

Specifically, I'm wondering the following:

1) You are clearly well aware that anti-Semitism is rampant right now and that Jews are blamed for all kinds of things beyond our control. Does your concern about anti-Semitism make it into any of your public discourse? Do you fight it openly, as you would racism, homophobia, xenophobia or hatred against any other group of people? And if not, why not?

2) I readily accept that people of goodwill can have a range of responses to the current war. I'm less certain about what it means that you have a Palestinian flag in your profile pic at a time when Jewish hostages are still in Gaza. It's one thing to want peace, to want safety and dignity for both groups. It's another to so brazenly assert one-sided loyalty to the group at war with your own people. I myself am a passionate Zionist, as you know. But even I don't have an Israeli flag in my profile pic. Because this isn't a sports event. This isn't an election. This is a tragic and intransigent conflict in which both sides have done terrible things and people on both sides are suffering terribly. If you're seeking peace, shouldn't you be a champion of both peoples?

3) Finally, why would you align with the scorchingly anti-Semitic JVP and their over-the-top eliminationist hatred of Israel and ignore an org like Standing Together, which would allow you to support actual Palestinians and Israelis on the ground who are working together toward peaceful co-existence? The problem with orgs like JVP, and the far left in general, is as you yourself just articulated: those performative utterly-divorced-from-reality politics are way too often at the expense of the actual people living and working and suffering within the conflict they somehow feel entitled to litigate. Why don't you follow the lead of the best people on the ground and support their authentic and holy work, instead of supporting hateful posturing by Americans on the sidelines who have nothing at stake?

If I hear back from her, I’ll let you know. In the meantime, maybe some of you are dealing with similar situations of your own. As hard as it can be to meet our ideological opponents where they are, with equanimity and curiosity, I think we should take every opportunity to close our rifts, to unite as Jews and to get good things done together.

I’ll be back with you on Friday, and I’ve saved some uplifting content to share with you then.

In the meantime, much love and strength to you all.

Am Yisrael Chai.